I had a couple cool experiences this week too that came from adversity. We still worked super hard this week, but it was sad because R*** moved permanently to Cavite and S*** moved to Baguio and B*** still needs permission and E*** wont let us teach him and J*** dad wont let him get baptized and K*** didn't come to church. So everything fell apart, the thing that made me really sad was that R*** moved, because pretty much my whole mission I have prayed for her and taught her and worked on her marriage and baptism, she was even the first lesson that I taught!
As I was feeling sad about this, we were teaching a lesson at a members house about service, I asked the dad "what are some simple things that you can do to serve others?"
His reply was totally out of context, and seemed random, but to me, it was revelation. He answered "Do you ever think about why Nephi was so obedient? or why Moroni stayed faithful even when he was the last of his people? That's kind of how you are as missionaries. Appointments don't work out, people you care about fail, and most people don't even care what you have to say. But you are called of the Lord and are on his errand and he will bless you, so always remember that and keep a smile on your face." It was incredible. He didn't know anything about our investigators, or how I was having a hard time, but Heavenly Father did. It's hard for me to trust him sometimes because I think I like to be in control of things, but when I do trust him, things get simpler. Then, the next day, President Mortimer came over to our house for a surprise inspection, he is the 1st counselor in the mission. I told him that story and he said, " I would just like to confirm that that was a message from our Heavenly Father directly to you and that he knows you and loves you." It was awesome, not only did Heavenly Father give me a message, but he also sent a confirmation the very next day!
As I read the Book of Mormon it always talks about how the children of men are so quick to forget the Lord their God and that is totally me. I receive these crazy things and then a couple days later, it feels like I need another one.
I was reading in the BOM and the Our Heritage book and it was talking about all these super successful missionaries, and then I thought about you, and then I thought about how people have told me how I'll become AP (a couple more have since I last told you) and it's so hard for me to see all of that happening. I try to just think of the now, but its hard, I think about the future a lot. I was asking Heavenly Father why he is not fulfilling his promises that are so abundant in the scriptures. I am praying, I am fasting, I am working hard, but I am not bringing thousands to the knowledge of the truth. This really bothers me a lot of the time. Then this thought entered my mind: "You have been saved for this time, I know your purpose, trust me." It's hard for me to trust him, but I'm trying.